Kangaroos are bipedal - why didn't THEY evolve to take down Osama? or USA! USA! USA!

Due to recent events, I decided to theme the blog title as such. Anyway, I'm not gonna talk about that at all so now on to something completely different (though I may have to come back to the bipedal nature of the kangaroo).

The beginning of the end is near in Australia...in terms of my presence in the this upside-down country anyway. My last day of work is May 13th. At which point I'll do a week of traveling before heading back home. Not nearly as much travel time as I would have wanted but unfortunately money is used in exchange of goods and services here too and I don't really have a surplus of said money (which here is mostly in annoying coin form).

You know how many of these I've lost?!? Why coins, Australia! WHY!

Hmm....not sure why I started writing this blog; I don't even have anything to ramble on about. I should probably grab another beer (perhaps a Coopers shall I seek). So yeah, kangaroos were bipedal animals long before man was, how come they didn't become super intelligent and invent iPods? I guess as necessary it is to free the hands to really be able to advance as a species you still need a large enough brain in order to use those hands for tools. Thanks to kangaroos' tiny little skulls, they inherently have tiny little brains. That and they only eat grass which I'm going to assume does not provide enough protein in order to develop a large brain. So all you vegans out there can thank your ancient carnivore ancestors for allowing the human race to develop enough to be able to cultivate soy so you can get your precious protein. "That's the way you debate!"

"Whoa, I blacked out. What happened?

Actually, I really have no idea what I'm talking about. Hell, almost all dinosaurs were bipedal and pretty dumb and they basically held down the Earth for like 150 million years? (except, unless Movies have taught me nothing, Velociraptors are all geniuses....Jurassic Park also taught me that Jeff Goldblum is still a terrible actor).

I guess I should throw something about Australia in here. Went to the Grampian range this past weekend (it's a mountain range and park in western Victoria with lots of hikes and what not). It was kinda raining the whole time so that put a damper (literally) on it. Got to see some wallabys and kangaroos up close which was cool. Also got to see some aboriginal rock art. So I got that going for me. All I need to see now is a wombat, tasmanian devil and a dingo and I'll have seen most of the crazy animals here in the wild. Oh wait, have to see a platypus somehow too. Ohhhh Australia: what God created during his stoner days.

Fancy that?, Fun Australian Facts:

-Arvo somehow means afternoon. I get the A and the R and, hell, even the O but the V? I think somebody had a typo and just went with (because ya see Australians are a really laid-back people). I'm just gonna call it Arno anyway.

"I think Pringles' initial intention was to make tennis balls, but on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. And Pringles is a laid-back company -- they said, 'F**k it. Cut 'em up.'-Mitch Hedberg

-Ta means thank you. I guess I sort of get that one, but seriously? does every word need a nickname? Then again I suppose DC has the equivalent "scume" for excuse me. (ha, Scume Jones...forgot about that one..sorry inside joke)
-I'm not even going to get started on the million different ways to order a beer. Each state seems to have it's own term for the size of beer you want.
-pretty sure a guy at work uses savvy all the time; he's like an Australian Jack Sparrow....then again I could be mishearing him which tends to happen daily.

Well, I think thats just about enough nothingness. You are all probably dumber for having read it. May god have mercy on your souls.

"Mr. Madison, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

And of course, some good (mostly) Australian music I very highly recommend:

San Cisco - Golden Revolver

Loon Lake - In the Summer

and the video I came soo close to getting casted for: SebastiAn - Embody ...sorry, not Australian

BONUS VIDEO: 

If you haven't seen it yet, the Beastie Boys made a hilarious short film starring all sorts of random famous people (my favorite is Will Arnett clearly doing a reference to GOB Bluth)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evA-R9OS-Vo

Not too many more blogs after this. I'm terribly sorry to both of you.