The Drifter Diaries or Life Attention Deficit Disor...whoa! look at that moth!: You can't spell Penola without "my god this town is boring" w/ bonus music at no extra cost

Yeah that's how I feel about Penola and now a random thought stream (enjoy or be afraid):

There is no good way to pour honey; it's clear now why god portions it out in bear shaped squeeze bottles.

I'm not sure if there is such a thing as eating too much yogurt but I'm currently testing the hypothesis (maybe Jamie Lee Curtis and her probiotic cronies will contact me about my research).

Forget Texas, everything is really bigger in Australia; insects anyway (or I guess I should say arthropods..."hey buddy did you catch the nerd"). Most spiders are the size of your palm and flies buzz around sounding like lawn mowers. Here regular flies are the size of horse flies and Horse flies are called that because they actually are the size of small horses.

I feel that in tv shows and movies where they have black tar heroin they use vegemite.

Down here they are about to pass a ruling that will make all cigarettes come in the same generic package. Personally I only see this benefiting people that smoke really classless brands (all brands are classless, remember kids; stay in class, you'll always have school) since no one will no longer know that they buy the cheap crackhead brand of cigarettes.

Quiche tastes pretty bad microwaved the next day.

In Australia, when you're drunk or hungover the room actually spins clockwise unlike counter-clockwise like in the northern hemisphere ......yeah, im recycling jokes; my blog is going green.

I think they add nicotine to Tim-tam cookies because I just can't stop eating them and I get irritable when I don't get my fix. The caramel kinds might have something even more potent added;nothing worse than coming off a caramel timtam bender.

I just realized this - they drive on the LEFT hand side of the road here! This explains why everyone keeps trying to play chicken with me.

Also on the subject of cars, you can't indicate by turning on the windshield wiper (granted I haven't done this in quite a while). You also can't drive from the passenger seat, funny enough. (to clarify for the folks Stateside, the windshield wiper thing is where the indicator is on US cars... you get where I'm going there? with the joke, there Fry-man?)

I live in a half time zone. Yeah so when it's 9:30 here, it's at the hour everywhere else in the world. Seriously, Australia? It just makes it confusing when explaining what time it is to people. I guess I should be glad I'm not in Phoenix where they just make up whatever timezone they want to follow (look it up).

I guess that's enough ramblings of a mad black woman, no wait that might be a Tyler Perry movie; that guy's alright, high five! Does he own TBS yet? Anyone else think he's the bizarro-world version of Ted Turner (or may Ted is the bizarro version since he's somewhat evil)? Perhaps we'll delve into that deep subject matter in the next chapter.

And now some more awesome Australian music (actually ~~some~~ almost all of these bands might not be from Oz but get plenty of play out here). Enjoy!

Mumford and Sons - Little Lion Man (pretty sure they're British)